MY LIFE ON THE BOWERY: NEGATIVE ADDICTION

(A reflection of my stumbling, near-apostasy through lack of obedience [God forbid!]
and struggle for repentance of bad habits)

I used to live in a room like a wired “cage” (as I thought of it) on the Bowery . (This is a realistic, great video, not the Hollywood version type—very sentimental to me!). It was at a place called the Delavan. I remember it as a death-trap—a place that a person will never get out of unless he makes an attempt to do so.

I never knew how easy it was to get so messed up. My childhood was great until I was about at least twelve. Then I noticed sometime during my youth that my mother changed and became hateful to me. Kicked me out of the house one time when I was lying on the bed, studying. I think she was having an affair and taking her misery out on me. Most mothers would be very pleased to see their children study and try to do well in school. Not mine. Well, I moved to my grandmother's house. Wasn't a great academic lift but at least I wasn't harassed. However, there was something very insidious. It was right across to where men drank along the street—a little skid row. Wasn't long before... you can guess what happened.

I wandered for years, it seemed like a bad habit too. Not all missions will accept certain people. I stayed in the streets at times. The Bowery was an inviting place to stay for a substance abuser in that way, but I left there also. I continued to wander. Eventually one very cold day in 1980, I was hitch-hiking toward Washington DC. A group of Teen Challenge evangelists picked me up in a van. I went with them for a while and stayed at one of their facilities in Maryland. I decided to leave there too. I never told anyone I was thinking about leaving. After speaking briefly at a church we visited, when I came out of the building, suddenly I walked to the highway and started hitch-hiking, left the group in like a snap of the finger. I caught a ride. One thing about it, I never wanted to smoke a cigarette or abuse alcohol or drugs again. The desire was gone.

It has been over thirty years now. I have went through several afflictions since then, but the Lord has always blessed me with peace and joy, and made me a better individual through my struggles.

Just a little note to let you know according to my former shame and inferior (negatively addicted) living, a method of survival other than following the commandments of Jesus, that I am familiar with people trying to survive from day to day in a hard world. I have suffered so much grief and affliction (much of it self-affliction), more than I know how to say. Thank God for his deliverance, amen.__Br. Ken

Further reflection: Press here.